Just arrive in the moment where you choose peace for the next. Do what you have to do to get there. Stop rushing to the next thing - there’s a peaceful moment in between that’s just waiting

I felt nauseated as I sang this. It was like I was embarking on a journey I was afraid to make.

I prepared in prayer and intention and clarified my presence.

I scribbled the lyrics down over 20 or so seconds of thoughtless outpour.

I felt uninspired to write the chords and copied some from an artist I like and then rewrote and rewrote until it fit my vibe

I tried to sing it four times holding harsh judgment to myself each time (even though this was a moment of birth and only practise makes perfect)

On the fifth time With a final countdown I jumped from the ledge and very quickly I was swept into a torrent of emotion.

It was an intense and uncomfortable yet somehow cathartic feeling. My chest still thumps as I remember though the moment is already long passed..whisped away

Somewhere in the middle I got distracted, or maybe afraid…then I struggled to find my way, fingers faltering. Usually I can predict the tone of the next chord (from practise and memory) and my singing is in key - but here I stumbled about all full of doubt

Growing tired I wanted to stop but the song wanted to keep playing so I played.

Again feeling so afraid.

Then the feeling came back - the one that nauseated me. quivering with shaky intent I continued to journey into that dark place that brings me so much fear.

And then I realised I was here.
And that God is here with me.
And that God is the space between us that feeds us all.
And that we are all connected by the synaptic thread. If we want to become aware of it we need only switch it on with our minds….our powerful minds.

So here I share my private thoughts and a description of a private moment I had with myself …in such gentle and vulnerable presence.

I am enough
I do enough
It is enough


It is
I do
I am

Stay vigilant, the mind is a sneaky character, but enjoy him, he’s a sneaky, y, friend who only has the best intentions for you …let him sit on your shoulder and whisper in your ear - you still have a choice what you do with it.

The magician casts his spell
You choose - heaven or hell?

And after all that…analysis paralysis
Aaaaaaaaaah
Pheeeewwww
Let me just have 1 minute of peace
A gift of gratitude to myself for all my hard work

And I just wrapped my arms around me and gave me the love I’ve been needing from myself.